My family and I were dreading Rudy Guiliani's commencement speech at Middlebury College in Vermont. We brought books to read to avoid having to listen to the drivel.
But I couldn't help but hear him from time to time. Engrossing as are Hawthorne's Tanglewood Tales, Rudy had a microphone, and I was more than a little curious about what sort of stuff he had. Why's he the darling of so many?
His speech came down to the following: Be optmisitic, contribute to the community and prepare. Standard commencement fare. For this he received an honorary doctor of laws?
He did tell one lawyer joke I will share:
A doctor, a priest and a lawyer present themselves at the gates of Heaven.
St. Peter offers the doctor a splendid condominium in paradise. It is recognition for all the lives the doctor has saved.
The priest, similarly, is offered a glorious apartment, his reward for the saving of souls.
When the lawyer approached, a celestial band played and St. Peter offered the keys to a spectacular manison overlooking every good and glorious thing.
"What?" said the priest, incredulous. The doctor merely gasped.
"We haven't had a lawyer here since the fifteenth century," St. Peter replied. "This is a big deal."
Rudy delivered the story with panache. As commencement fare went, he was so-so, and nothing to protest about.